It has been a while since I blogged about the girls. My last post was about beginning of a new era: Kindergarten. Nine weeks have gone by and I think I could have written a novel just filled with emotions and all the changes it has entailed. I titled this post, “Survival of the Fittest,” because that is what it has felt like. I feel I have been to battle and back. Adjustment after adjustment, tear after tear, but I believe we are slowly turning a corner just right in time for the holidays!
Any mother can relate to the day you first watch your kiddos walk through those big school doors and look back and say, “Bye, Mom!” I have had a million people ask me if I cried. Well, I am human people! I did wait until I got in the car with my husband. It was the ugly cry no doubt. I knew they would be happy and have a great day. They have an adorable teacher. Going to school six hours a day, five days a week has been exhausting on the girls. There have been several, “we have to go again today?” Unfortunately, yes you do my loves.
It has been hard on both of us. I feel empty nested. I don’t have a baby or toddler to go home to when they go to school. I don’t work outside the home. The big question, “What do you do with all your free time now?” I got passed being somewhat insulted by this question. Some people are just generally curious and I get that. I have had six years of utter adventure and a non-stop physically taxing job raising them to this point. It has been sort of a bitter sweet symphony (insert theme from Cruel Intentions). We are all navigating this new season together.
This sweet girl above has hit me out of left field with some separation anxiety. It has broken me at times seeing her in tears and upset just about going to school. As much as you can nail down a five year-old, I have explored every issue that could possible be the reason why she doesn’t entirely like the school process. Bottom line, she just misses time with her mama. Boy my girl, me too. You have no idea. In true Emily resilience, things are moving upward! You go my big girl! We are exploring her gifts and giving her space to be the silly little one she is. She has a heck of a swing, so maybe golf or tennis in her future!
Avery takes on challenges in true stride. Not much shakes her and her confidence is something to be admired. She is trucking along about to learn a back handspring at tumbling and taking on dance once again in a mini-hip-hop class. She is super eager to read by herself.
Camdyn…Oh Cam..She is the ultimate teacher’s helper. Seriously loves all things school. Has been incredibly happy and is such a sweet friend to new friends at school. She is also doing tumbling and her confidence has really soared. She used to be really hard on herself if she didn’t get something right away. I have seen over time how practice is making perfect or at least teaching her she can accomplish it if she wants to. She is also doing dance!
Although this post is greatly delayed all of the emotions are still ringing true for this mama. My faith in the Lord has pushed me to feel and to conqueror this season with new hope for the future. Thank God he meets us right where we are every day. We all know some days are better than others!
Those days of bottles and a mountain of diapers are gone. I never in a million years thought I would grieve for those days. Ok, I lied. I don’t grieve for any of that. I am more than happy to put that behind us. But, the littles. The little fingers, little toes, little words, just all things little are growing into bigger girls engaged in a bigger world.
Lord, thank you for our health and these gifts we get to call our daughters. I promise to pull up my bootstraps and get on with it! Haha.